This week I have learnt from the study materials that most people don’t listen with an intent to understand – they listen with the intent to reply. They are either speaking or preparing to speak. They see others through the lens of their own autobiographies. The key to understanding another person is empathetic listening – really trying to understand everything (including the nonverbal signals) the other person is communicating. You listen for feeling and for meaning, for behavior and other signals. You are totally focused on the other person’s point of view, not projecting your own life’s story into their words.
When you communicate synergistically, you are opening your mind and heart to new possibilities, new alternatives and new options. You create something entirely new that is better than you ever thought it could be. This is the very essence of team spirit.
This requires a high level of both trust and cooperation amongst all participants. In fact, mutual trust is a key. If trust is low, the activity is dominated by legal jargon in order to protect everyone’s interests. In a medium level of trust, there is respectful communication with polite intellectual compromises in effect.